Proactive Reactions: Amazing Ways to Handle Difficult Situations
Over a year ago, I volunteered to be a classroom facilitator with Success for Kids, an non-profit organization that teaches at-risk children how to make better choices and deal with challenging situations. Before letting me in a classroom, Yossef Sagi, now the Director of SFK South Florida, taught me something in one of the orientation classes that has helped me not only with the kids at Carol City Elementary, but with people of all ages.
Here is what I learned.
How to deal with kids (and we’re all kids)With this method, you should eventually be able to make lemonade out of any lemons.
Someone makes you feel
- Worried
- Exhausted
- Irritated
- Annoyed
- Sorry For
Their issue/desire
- Undue Attention
- Imagine them wearing a t-shirt saying
- “Involve me!”
You should
- Re-enforce positive
- Ignore Negative
Someone makes you feel
- Angry
- Challenged
- Defeated
Their issue/desire
- Misguided Power
- Imagine them wearing a t-shirt saying
- “Let me help.”
You should
- Offer choices/opportunities
- “Give me choices.”
Someone makes you feel
- Hurt
- Disgusted
- Disbelieving
Their issue/desire
- Revenge
Imagine them wearing a t-shirt saying
- “Help me.”
- “I’m hurting.”
You should
- Ask what he/she needs.
- Ask “How are you feeling?”
- Tell them how you feel.
Someone makes you feel
- Despairing
- Hopeless
- Their issue/desire
- Assumed inadequacy
Imagine them wearing a t-shirt saying
- “Believe in me.”
- “Don’t give up on me.”
You should
- Tell them “You can do it!”
- Cheerlead!
Don’t believe me, try it out for yourself. This really works, and will help you turn the most difficult situations into amazing success stories. Another tip worth mentioning: this also applies to you. When you feel any of these emotions about yourself, check yourself. This can be a challenging process, but stick with it, it’s worth it!
I also recommend another tool designed to help people communicate with children, which really applies to everyone:
Again, we are all big kids, and this book lives up to it’s title with more than just children.
Happy Proacting!